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Tag Archives: N64 Magazine

ONM Remembered – #466

“Dropping the joypad after a minute and walking off exclaiming ‘What a steaming great dumper!’ will not do anything for Anglo-Nippon relations. Unless it’s Seta. They’re probably used to it.” from N64 Magazine issue 11 (January 1998)

ONM Remembered – #455

“Some of the motion-capture is outstanding and some of the moves even appear to connect! Crikey, Hudson – with this fighting game you are really spoiling us.” from N64 Magazine issue 17 (July 1998)

ONM Remembered – Pack-In Week, day 4

“Reset Button: This button resets your N64 if, for instance, you’re fed up to the back teeth with the somewhat lengthy ‘congratulations’ sequence in Mario Kart 64.” from The Nintendo 64 Companion (pack-in with N64 Magazine issue 11, January 1998)

ONM Remembered – prelude to Pack-In Week

“Very, very fast at top speed, but you’ll never get Tommy there, as he’s so fat that his cornering and acceleration don’t exist in this universe. Sorry Tommy, we defend anyone’s right to eat burgers all day (or Ginster’s Chicken and Mushroom Slices, in our case), but to be honest, you’re useless.” from N64 Magazine […]

ONM Remembered – #441

“Try again? Oh, Aero Gauge, you are a wag.” from N64 Magazine issue 17 (July 1998)

ONM Remembered – #421

“Even after artificially raising their hopes for a universal machine then releasing a late, overpriced, absurdly slower model and charging ludicrous sums for late, incompetently-converted games, such as, for example, Wave Race, Britain remains tenaciously eager! What could we possibly do next that’s more fun? Wait! I have it. We’ll delay the PAL Yoshi’s Island […]

ONM Remembered – Wallop Week, day 7

“Still, all the best games filch the best elements from films, and Mace’s character design is no exception. Well, at least they left the ‘Knights Who Say Nee’ out. Thankfully.” from N64 Magazine issue 9 (December 1997)

ONM Remembered – Wallop Week, day 3

“Scott Norton was once mistaken for a beached whale, tranquilised and put into San Diego Zoo, only being discovered when the relevant authorities realised whales don’t speak English.” from N64 Magazine issue 12 (February 1998)

ONM Remembered – #407

“I love Breetish laydeez.” from N64 Magazine issue 23 (December 1998)

ONM Remembered – #402

“We’re not talking CDs here, which aren’t quite as tolerant of having strawberry jam slapped all over them as we might have been led to believe.” from N64 Magazine issue 11 (January 1998)

ONM Remembered – #400

“This month we were struck on the heads by a GoldenEye 007 cartridge.” from N64 Magazine issue 9 (December 1997)

ONM Remembered – #396

“When Alison the Publisher walked in two days before this issue had to be at the printers and asked why we were playing deathmatch GoldenEye 007 when we still had half the magazine to write, I removed a grille on the wall, slipped through the hole into the ventilation duct beyond, and hid there till […]

ONM Remembered – #394

“You get given money and you have to decide how to spend it. Or you can spend it on girls, or Vodka Martinis.” from N64 Magazine issue 17 (July 1998)

ONM Remembered – #375

“In Blast Corps, Amber is always saying: “You’re just trying to undress me.” I find the tension quite unbearable.” from N64 Magazine issue 17 (July 1998)

ONM Remembered – #370

“To triumph at a game. Any game, you understand. I’m really not fussy.” from N64 Magazine issue 13 (March 1998)

ONM Remembered – #364

“Oh, and Nintendo have signed up Tim Follin to compose the soundtrack in the style of REO Speedwagon. Or maybe I just haven’t got a clue. You decide.” from N64 Magazine issue 11 (January 1998)

ONM Remembered – #357

“Ah, Paul! Come again to show off your Pot Noodle? We can also eat, but we prefer fresh, nourishing food!” from N64 Magazine issue 8 (November 1997)

ONM Remembered – #355

“Presumably – if this is anything to go by – the Japanese game is played with a beach ball.” from N64 Magazine issue 10 (Christmas 1997)

ONM Remembered – #352

“In fact, getting in the way of other pedestrians is the fastest growing national sport, with points deducted for looking behind you.” from N64 Magazine issue 17 (July 1998)

ONM Remembered – #348

“I reckon it’s a type of South American dance involving fruit.” from N64 Magazine issue 11 (January 1998)