Random Hoo Haasthe blog with the guff

Aw, you’re all heart, sonny.

Friday, December 24, 2010 at 1:23 pm Comments (1)

Given my status as a rampant Nintendo fanboy, you’d think I’d have talked about Donkey Kong Country Returns by now, right? I haven’t even so much as mentioned it since the time it was shown at E3, and the game’s been out, what, over two weeks now in the UK? Well, truth is, I only got my copy on Monday! My brother preordered his but even then thanks to the terrific weather we’re currently having pretty much all postage has been delayed quite badly, so it took a week to arrive even after its release date. Awesome.

The first thing to be asked when talking about a Donkey Kong Country game is this – is it challenging enough to make you utter increasingly-creative expletives? Yes. Yes it is. Is that a good thing? You bet your bananas it is. It’s very relieving to play a game with proper kick-you-in-the-face challenge again. Returns basically takes the tough-as-nails level design of the original trilogy, turns it up several notches, and moulds it into a curveball and expects you to get it on the first shot. This is also why I should be banned from making analogies when I have had barely any sleep. Basically, it’s tough!
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“[…] selected participants will receive a brand spankin’ new pair of Etna’s panties to wear or to just admire in all of their glory!”

Sunday, October 24, 2010 at 6:15 pm Comments (8)

Today’s observation: I don’t think I want to hang out with the games industry anymore.

If I could just make my own games I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have anything to complain about anymore.

Shark-mobile: Can it work?

Friday, October 22, 2010 at 10:14 pm Comments (3)

So, before Sonic 4 sidetracked me, what newly bought game was I going to talk about two weeks ago? Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts, that’s what! I finished Banjo-Tooie again recently (well, okay, I got all the Jiggies in Grunty Industries, and personally that’s enough of a trial for me to say I’ve beaten the game) so I’ve been hungering for more of the same. I picked this up about three weeks ago in CeX for a mere £6, and I could hardly turn it down. I’d been meaning to get the game via the Games On Demand service under the belief that it would directly support Rare… but seriously, £6! Screw attempts at generosity, I can hardly argue with a price like that.

I say I was hoping for more of the same, but I’m aware the Nuts & Bolts is basically a whole new direction for the series. It’s still an adventure game about collecting trinkets to open up new areas and unlock abilities of some kind, but now the emphasis is on vehicular building. However, it’s more accurate to say the game is an entirely different specimen with a light coating of Banjo slathered over it, as really, it’s a whole different game.
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Sonic Made It Through Act 4!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010 at 9:45 pm Comments (9)

I was going to talk a little about some games I’ve been playing lately (two recently bought, one I haven’t played in ten years), but then I realised, whoops, Sonic the Hedgehog 4 is out and I haven’t made any cynical remarks on it yet!
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“Look, girls! It’s our boy with no pants!”

Wednesday, October 6, 2010 at 10:17 pm Comments (8)

What horrible events have prevented me from updating the blog in a whole week? Not much. I’ve just been a bit of vegetable, really. You’ve heard it a dozen times – I want to be productive, but being a lazy bastard is just that much more appealing. Didn’t I say I was going to have something made for the site this month? Ooer!

Back in September I was still determined to continue from where I left off from this little escapade and find a way to get GameCube functionality for the Wii Classic Controller. I’ve seen Classic Controllers online that have GameCube plugs online, but usually they’re on the dodgiest of dodgy sites and the ones on eBay aren’t exactly inspiring either. Of course, I’ve thrown cash towards all manner of shady places for poorly-thought-out needs, so I ordered one for a mere £4. And surprisingly, it actually arrived this time!
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“And I kicked his ass so hard he saw the curvature of the Earth.”

Thursday, September 23, 2010 at 9:28 pm Comments (3)

I went to see Scott Pilgrim last night. While Resident Evil: Degeneration is a video game movie in atmosphere and overall vibe, Scott Pilgrim is effectively a video game movie in visuals, action, and general corniness. And it works so, so well.

… do I really need to explain the story? I mean, I’m pretty sure anyone even faintly familiar with it knows at least the basic gist. Love story, have to defeat girl’s evil ex-boyfriends, nerd references, yadda yadda yadda. You could try and say that it’s basically a love story of people fighting for the girl’s affection taken very, very literally, but I’ll be frank and say it’s a simple plot. The main attraction is simply the look and feel of the movie.

And my god, what a look and feel it is!
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I still think Diglett has a protruding pink mouth

Tuesday, September 21, 2010 at 11:54 pm Comments (8)

There’s a lot of things I don’t give a hoot about, but I love discussing them with people. I’d like to say that I enjoy discussing politics with similarly cynical people, but, well, no, I don’t. It’s an exercise in losing my will to live. What I do enjoy discussing, however, is Pokémon! With select people, of course. With any old Tom, Dick or Harry it also becomes an exercise in losing my will to live. I do not care to discuss the tournament rules of Pokémon battling, buddy, just give me a debate about why people think Gardevoir is so attractive and then I can get my Freudian ball rolling.

Namely, something I was discussing recently was the leakage of, well, everything from the new games Black & White. All one hundred and fifty something of the new creatures? Everyone knows what they are now, apparently! I was shown this little creature…

… and I was rather… offput by it.
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“Anyone with hair that long doesn’t have a life worth living.”

Monday, September 20, 2010 at 11:48 pm Comments Off on “Anyone with hair that long doesn’t have a life worth living.”

Watched Resident Evil: Degeneration. It’s a film full of slow-motion bullet tracking, stuff blowing up, needlessly dramatic emotional scenes and characters being unharmed after being punched across the room. Is it any surprise my dad considered it one of the best video game movie he’s seen so far?

Like any good Resident Evil story, my interpretation of it was like so: A load of convoluted balls.
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King of the Limbo!

Thursday, August 5, 2010 at 6:49 pm Comments (1)

So, I tried the demo of Limbo, some 2D platformer that people are claiming to be the new definition of artsy fartsy, all because it doesn’t have music or colour.

(Thanks to Codie for reminding me how appropriate this picture is, and also how terrible my arms are)
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Castlevania: Disenchantment of Multi-player Nonappearance

Wednesday, August 4, 2010 at 8:39 pm Comments (7)

Castlevania: Harmony of something-beginning-with-D is out! And I only heard about it last month! So, what’s it like?

Well thanks to the wonderful world of game demos I can’t actually tell, as I haven’t bought the game and the demo offers only the first level with Alucard as the sole playable character. I can get behind that. It may not be cool, but that’s just how the world of demos is run.

I’m not so appreciative of the fact that it doesn’t offer the multi-player mode. What the hell? That’s like shilling a Sonic game without the speed, or a Metal Slug game without the bullets.
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