Sonic Underground

Normally, I'd have to waffle out a load of self-written nonsense to get the general premise across to those who are oblivious to the show before, but the Meat Loaf wannabe sets out the story quite simply in the opening rock song.


Triplets born, the throne awaits,
A seer warns of a deadly fate,
Give up your children, separate,
Bide your time, lie in wait,

Sonic Underground!
Sonic Underground!
They made a vow,
Their mother will be found.

The children grow, learn what's right,
Leaders of the freedom fight,
They seek their mother, she knows they do,
Is it time, if she only knew,
Will the prophecy come true?

Sonic Underground!
Sonic Underground!

"I long for my children, but I have to wait,
To act too soon could seal their fate!"

They made a vow,
Their mother will be found,
Sonic Underground!


What this doesn't get across is the fact that the hedgehog triplets (Sonic, Manic and Sonia) all fight the forces of evil with explosive instrumentation, and one of the bad guys can transform into things.


The Deepest Fear


This premise is completely discarded because Sonic is a ship's captain, roughing out the turbulent seas and lightning filled skies in an attempt to challenge Moby Deep, one of your typical sea monsters, to a one-on-one battle to the death. In old-timey talk, of course, so "thee" and "hast" is strewn around in every sentence. Moby Deep rises from a ludicrously oversized whirlpool and takes on this challenge.


They start off with some boring foreplay, captain Sonic being all "you can't catch me" while Moby Deep just goes "roar" because ol' Moby's just your regular sea monster, throwing spears and flailing tentacles respectively without much being done. Moby eventually takes hold of the ship and begins throttling it, but Sonic proves that cartoon super speed can justify any demonstration of super strength, and ties the beast's tentacles together. "Give me a call when you're not tied up!" Groan.

What Sonic failed to realise was that Moby Deep, being a sea monster, can swim, and he can't. It dives down beneath the waves, taking the ship with it, and Sonic too. Way to go, knucklehead!


Of course, this is just a dream, and Sonia blames the nightmare on Sonic having three chilli dogs before going to bed. He claims he needs four before he can sleep good.

The three are on their way to Port Mobius, where they've been told they'll be meeting their mother there, though in case it's not true, they can at least hit the beach for a swim. Sonic doesn't see why they'd want to do that, and chooses to head over to their destination on foot, arriving long before his siblings.


And his first sight is a monument to Queen Aleena, which gives him hope that this town won't be a hive of scum and villainy. Tugging off the sheet, that sheet is revealed to be his transforming enemy Dingo, whose partner Sleet runs in with a number of Swatbots, who all proceed to open fire on Sonic. Sonic blows up real good.


Yet again, the fact he blatantly explodes is forgiven by his sonic speed, and our titular hedgehog is standing elsewhere, and the Swatbots' attempts to blast him just end up blowing themselves up eventually. Running into a group of citizens, Sonic enquires if they're members of the resistance and willing to help him out, but the drawing of their weaponry towards him answers that question. He makes a dash for the gates, but they're closed before he can reach them...


Which is really no problem when make a buzz saw out of yourself. He's still not out of trouble yet, and soon finds himself in range of Sleet's giant mechanical scorpion, who believes he won't miss this time. That's precisely what happens, and the stray blast knocks over the monument, crushing the contraption beneath it. Finding the door out, he takes hold of the handle and is subsequently trapped by it, the door being another of Dingo's wacky tricks. It's sorted out when Manic and Sonia arrive and ram the door down.


They're informed that Queen Eleena is supposedly at the actual port part of Port Mobius, but the search is interrupted by a sole Swatbot chasing after them, which is aptly sorted out with a dosage of Sonic's guitar. In the distraction, Sonia fails to debunk the belief that women can't drive and flies right off the port, somehow making it all the way to a distant ship, and crashing inside and knocking down every chair and table on the way in.


The captain doesn't seem to mind at all, introducing himself as Captain Squeege and welcoming them to the Queen Eleena, his showboat, and informing them that he's the leader of the local resistance; and really about the only resistance the place has. Everyone on his side joined up with Robotnik when they heard he could protect them from the terrors of Moby Deep, but Squeege believes the three hedgehogs could be the very people who could help him catch the supposedly mystical beast, and prove that his former allies won't need Robotnik's protection.

While Dingo and Sleet command a few bounty hunters to get searching for the hedgehogs in the port, the resistance keep talking about the situation on the boat, and Sonia suggests that perhaps Robotnik is sinking ships to stir up fear of sea monsters so the citizens will all come to him for help? Sonic's glad that this mystery is solved and aims to get his ass out of here, but Manic has an idea that could prove whether or not Moby Deep exists or not, which is simply bouncing sound waves off of it underwater, demonstrating with some drums, a microphone and a tub of water in the show hall.

After some pointless antics involving Squeege absorbing all the water in the tub, they aim to head out and put the method to use to see if the supposed sea monster is precisely that or just a Robotnik submarine, but Sonic has no intention to come along and heads back to the port. Manic comments on Sonic's reluctance to go anywhere near water, and Squeege comments that it can happen to anyone, but if he can overcome it then things should be pretty dandy. Manic doubts Sonic would bother with anything like that.

While Squeege, Sonia and Manic head out to sea, Dingo spies on this and seems it odd for a showboat to be heading out at this time of night, and returns to port to inform Sleek.


While Sonic is snooping around, he sees two Swatbots guarding a door, so he distracts them and makes his way inside, discovering a sea monster-themed submarine! He doesn't have much time to gawk as Sleek marches in, followed by Dingo who informs him of what he saw, and it is noted that Squeege had been rumoured to be a member of the resistance, so to be seen with any of the Sonic siblings would prove it. The two head out in the submarine, explicitly stating that they're using it to make people believe they're being attacked by Moby Deep. Halfway in and our mystery's gone, folks.


He attempts to get on the sub and stop them, but it submerges before he can reach it, so he opts for warning Manic and Sonia about the situation, and busts out of the building with the two Swatbots now following. Hopping on a raft, he speeds out... and speeds back in, his excuse for not going being "that sea's full of water!"


His next plan is to warn Manic and Sonia, and makes his way to the top of a lighthouse with an umbrella, opening and closing it to make the light blink. Manic just blinks the light has a short circuit. Seeing the ship make no reaction, he opts for a megaphone to call out their names, though Squeege believes it's just a foghorn, and the sound draws the Swatbots ever closer. Of course, any sense of danger is nullified when, heading back down again, Sonic knocks them down the stairs and reduces them to scrap metal in the process.


While Sleek and Dingo prepare to attack the Queen Eleena, Sonic boards a ship and is reluctant to head out, but a group of Swatbots opening fire sets his mind to it, where the sudden jolt of the engine starting knocks the lot of them off. Of course, the silly melon forgot to untie it from the dock, and the second jolt of the rope snapping knocks him off and forces him to do some waterskiing.


Just when he thinks this scenario isn't too bad, two Swatbot ships flank him and begin firing! Being mere mooks, you can imagine how well their accuracy is, and eventually all three ships crash into a rock wall, the explosions propelling Sonic into the air and back down again, into the sea. And only now we discover why he's been such a cowardly puss - he can't swim!


Ever so conveniently, a humongous whale leaps through the air, catching Sonic on its back, and lands down again, introducing itself as none other than Moby Deep! The whale explains this bizarre predicament while Sonic offers the big lug the opportunity to trash up Sleek and Dingo's submarine, but Moby explains that he's afraid of boats, since they all aim to harm him in some way. Upon learning of Sonic's inability to swim, Moby offers to give him a lift back to wherever he wants, and Sonic gets the chance to warn Manic and Sonia in person.


While Sleek and Dingo's submarine approaches the Queen Eleena, Sonic is dropped off at the boat as Moby departs, and is given the opportunity to explain that their sea monster couldn't possibly have been totalling ships, and after the ship is rocked by a bodily collision, states that it's really a Robotnik submarine. A bit late for the warning, though. Water is seeping in down below, so while Squeege absorbs it all, Sonic boards up the hole with some planks coupled with super speed. I don't think that quite justifies it, but I know nothing about naval safety procedures.


Sonia notes that they could very easily blow up that submarine if it weren't for the fact it was submerged, but thanks to the fact Sleek and Dingo hate music, and also how there's been a mild subplot going on regarding aquatic soundwaves and all that jazz, Sonic dumps a sound system in the ocean and... sets about with an Awkward Song Time.

I was hoping I wouldn't be seeing these again after I finished Captain N. OH DADDY WHY

While Sonic and company get some ragtime jazz going on, the electronics in Sleek and Dingo's sub go kaput, forcing them to the surface and allowing the three to use ROCK POWER and explodify their vessel.


Sleek makes his way back to shore with Dingo as his transport, but being a fish, Moby Deep chases after them in hopes of acquiring some dinner. Sonic notes that it's okay to have fears so long as it doesn't slow you down (groan), and with the whale proven to be a big ol' softy, nobody will need Robotnik's protection from now on. Huzzah!

Well, okay, there's a bit after that involving some allusion to continuity and how Queen Eleena is helping their kids behind the scenes or something like that, but I honestly can't make out what the characters are saying, and since I'm watching this out of continuity it's not like it'd mean a lot if I knew either.


This is actually the least horrendous of the episodes I've seen. Make of that what you will.