Party Line


While on a pleasant stroll, Mario points out to Luigi that living in Dinosaur World is bad for your health, as brought to their attention by a random dinosaur attack, and several cave people being bigger morons than usual, such as walking into giant, easily avoidable pits or swinging into coconut trees. Yoshi then trips over a block and scrapes his knee, while the Princess happens to appear with several comically sized band-aids. "It's a good thing band-aids come in four sizes," Mario comments.










Mario cracks another gag, Luigi completely ignores the fact Peach appeared seconds after Yoshi hurt himself, and suggests that an emergency phone number should be installed in the city, and despite the fact they're immediately chased by a giant dinosaur for all of ten seconds, they continue the conversation and tell Yoshi that without a telephone, an emergency number would be quite redundant. Quite conveniently, a coconut drops on Yoshi's head, doubly conveniently splitting in two in the process, so after Mario connects them with a vine, he and Luigi give it a whirl and his invention is complete!


In no seconds flat, they've installed a telephone in every home and given the Princess the wonderful job as the operator. The cave people, living up their standard idiocy, are instead using the phones are means of babbling and gossiping to each other, instead of the whole emergency service thing. It doesn't help any that the vines are multiplying, and any chance of making them talk less by sending them a phone bill fails due to their illiteracy. And there are other worries that Luigi points out.


"If they don't tend their crops, they won't eat; if they won't eat, they'll starve! It could be the END OF CAVE PEOPLE-KIND"


And then there's also the worry of the cave people completely ignoring the Wigglers swarming outside their houses to munch on the Mario brothers. The only good opportunity to use the emergency number so far, and things go pear shaped, so they resort to old-fashioned tradition of climbing up a nearby tree. Problem? Caterpillars can climb. Their only possible solution, floating blocks, are too high up to reach without the assistance of cartoon physics; in this case, being bitten on the toe and launching fifty feet into the air, and then completely missing the star that popped out.


Luigi manages to grab it, though, and with the greatest of ease, catapults the caterpillars into space where they chow down on a passing meteorite. However, thanks to the attack, numerous phone lines were cut, upsetting the cave people and resulting in tons of complaints at Peach, who's almost choked to death by rampant vines, giving them more reason to end the phone service, but yet another diversion blocks their way.


DINOSAUR ATTACK. And since the cave people are total morons who can't hear the footsteps of a giant tyrannosaurus rex right outside their windows, Peach and Luigi are left to warn them while Mario gets into zany antics in the awkward song time. I don't understand his logic. Why directly approach the dinosaur if you're just going to run away from him anyway? Even if it is like a mile tall, it'd still realise that a microscopic plumber is tugging on his tail.


Continuing the cartoon physics from earlier, Mario misses out on his chance to get a feather, but manages to get himself a working star from being dizzy, and spins the dinosaur into the space without the need of a tree as a catapult. Suddenly night time, they find the cave people have talked themselves to sleep, so they decide this to be the perfect time to strike, and Yoshi, finally appearing again after the beginning of the episode, munches down all the vines happily. "I'm having a VINE time, Mario!"

A satellite? In Dinosaur World? Preposterous. Never mind the fact Dinosaur World could simply be a small part of a larger, more advanced world, I SAY IT'S PREPOSTEROUS.