You might be asking, "why the long break since the last part?"
Well, buddy, you saw what happened. I was fuming after that last dungeon. Taking a year to cool off is a decent record by my standards! In fact, I'd dare say I accomplished a fair bit in the interim. It's just... I never got around to writing it up for another two years. After the temper I worked up last time, can you blame me? It's bad enough while playing it, it's worse when you're replaying the footage and know you can't intervene during your dumb mistakes.
Either way, we've a very short romp ahead of us, so let's say we stop faffing about and get a move on, eh, BABBS?
Oh, not again. Wakey wakey, sleepy bones!
Get your skates on, BABBS! Jeez, you'd think I was stalling for time or something!
Since my last foray, I actually spent some off-sessions getting a little bit more acquainted with Hyrule, and if I remember correctly, I can load up on some cool goodies before forging on!
For instance, if I push this rock it will...!
This door, though? It contains some really sweet--
Y'know, I've a feeling I learnt absolutely nothing in all that time.
Scratch that, I bombed a wall and got myself an extra heart container. Sweet beans.
And hidden beneath a statue on the mountains was this old man telling me to look inside some foliage. That's educational.
And because I'm at 6 hearts now, I now qualify for the badass old-man-in-a-cave-guarded-by-some-centaur-throwin'-knives-at-people sword!
Which, personally, I have to raise issue with. I wasn't fit to wield it before, but now that I can get clocked in the face a couple more times, I'm qualified. Now, surely someone who can take fewer thumps to the face before collapsing would be in greater need of a stronger sword, rather than someone who's already a bit more durable? It's too early in the day to start arguing. I'm not the man handing out swords anyway.
I should also mention in the last dungeon I acquired the ladder, which is a bunch of wooden poles strung together between two long ones. I'm not sure if I explained it, but its purpose is to let you cross one-tile-wide moats.
I don't know, but something tells me that I'm meant to be going left.
This fancy new sword is making mincemeat out of those pesky sword-chuckin' centaurs. They've got nothin'!
I found a suspicious passage while casually bombing rock formations...
... and holy shit it's dungeon 9?!??
Nope. Balls to that. Not ready for this. There's more sensible things I could be doing. Like stocking up on hearts, for instance!
Or I could get immediately slaughtered by centaurs. Poetic justice is an unkind force.
There's no dungeons under these bushes. Believe me, I've looked.
The ladder's proving useful, though - I've found another heart piece alongside the coast!
And the raft's showing its worth - has it led me to another dungeon?!
No, but it's just as good - it's another heart container! I ain't arguing one bit.
Plus FREE MOBLIN MONEY!!! This is a good day for aimless stumbling.
And jeez, speaking of aimless stumbling...
... right around this corner is another dungeon! A proper one, not one of those fake ones that old people hide in!
And of all dungeons, it's the second freakin' dungeon! The one that's somehow eluded me for the past three years! Now that's what I call opportune.
The dungeon appears to be populated almost entirely by snakes, which I can't remember if I've encountered before or not. They move faster sideways then they do up or down, but they're not much of a threat.
And those boomerang fellas are no match for me now that I've got a bow. (Which, incidentally, is my first time using the bow - it consumes 1 rupee per arrow, which is a fair trade if you ask me!)
Speaking of boomerangs, I've just found an improved one that reaches all the way to the end of the screen! I bet I can use this against the boss!
Which is... a slow-moving trail of fireballs? I-- I wonder why this thing never became a staple of Link's rogues gallery. It's not the boss, though, and it doesn't pose much of a challenge either; smack it a few times and it drops a map.
Sorry, pal, Zany VG Quotes spoiled me on that factoid years ago.
Aha, there's the big-bellied beast itself! It's not the most glamourous of debuts, though; Dodongo poses absolutely no threat and is scarcely bigger than a jumbo-sized pig. Either way, everyone knows there's only one way to defeat a Dodongo - with a boomerang!
Rats. Well, no harm trying.
What you really have to do is lay a bomb in its path and wait for it to gobble it up...
... and a single bomb is all it takes? Yikes! That's surprisingly courteous. I'm so used to the later fights requiring mulitple bombs before they expire. After all, as the beginning o the series it would be a puzzle to figure out what item is required to defeat it; there's no point in drawing it out. Kudos, Zelda 1.
And for the cost of one bomb, I have an extra heart piece and another triforce piece under my belt!
Well, that was surprisingly painless. I could offer some false platitude like "well, I definitely learnt some skills from my last excursion!", but really, it's the difference between entering a mid-game dungeon and a dungeon for beginners. The fight with Gleeok expects you to come armed with wits, cunning and less-crummy armour, while this one... expects you to have picked up a bomb at some point. It's a world of difference.
Still, now that I've finally cleared the first four dungeons, and know the whereabouts of dungeon 5, I think my mind's made up on my next course of action. Onward!