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ONM Remembered – #119

“Alert! Alert! Dodgy crock of bottocks in the area.”

from Official Nintendo Magazine 61 (October 1997)

What games have the ONM staff been playing this month? Half the N64’s library, from the looks of it!
You’ve got to admire some of those stunning single-sentence criticisms. Why is Killer Instinct good? Because it’s Killer Instinct! Why is it bad? Because it’s Killer Instinct! And apparently the only gripe they have with Pilotwings is the distinct lack of blood and guts. What, crashing a man’s body halfway through a cliff face isn’t hardcore enough?

Speaking of XTREME MATURE GAMING, the ONM staff have concocted a list of women they’re currently pining over, apparently as a space filling exercise. It’s pretty classy, especially when a third of the girls are either fictional, polygonal, or characters from soap operas.
For those who are curious, the Rumble Pak girl in David’s list is referring to Ryoko Hirosue, a Japanese idol who advertised the Rumble Pak at the time. Any time ONM had a chance to talk about Japan, advertising or the state of their bed sheets, they’d find an excuse to reprint her magazine ads, and misspell her name every time. What a charming legacy to leave behind.